I'm backk :: Selamat Hari Raya

Assalamualaikum & Hai ! 

Hahahaha. Lamanya dah tak menulis. Kalau tengok post2 terdahulu, semuanya time aku maseh kat Sabah. Now aku kat semenanjung dah ! yeahhh i love semenanjunggggggg lol.

Sekarang tgh cuti sem, eh, lebih tepat dkatakan cuti raya la. cuti sem mcm tak kene je nak sebut -,- cuti sebulan, memang seronok tak terkiraaa la. Even mmg byk habiskan masa kat rumah je pun, tak jalan2 mana, its still heaven for me :D 

Anyway, its still not too late to wished Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir & Batin to everyone out there yang mengenali diri ini. Like how we treat Ramadhan this time so special, thus as well as Syawal. Make Syawal this time more special to be celebrated with people we loved :D

BYE xoxo

Hmmm?

Sigh.
Got two more papers left, but no mood to study.
No mood at all.
Where my mind is going actually?




study la woiii ! studyyyyyy !
Ada jugak kang keluar exam hall besok nyesal tak sudah. Hmmmm.

Things aren't like before.

1)

Can anybody hear me?

Or am I talking to myself?

My mind is running empty

In the search for someone else

Who doesn’t look right through me.

It’s all just static in my head

Can anybody tell me why I’m lonely like a satellite?

‘Cause tonight I’m feeling like an astronaut

Sending SOS from this tiny box

And I lost all signal when I lifted up

Now I’m stuck out here and the world forgot

Can I please come down? 

‘Cause I’m tired of drifting around and round 

Can I please come down?

I’m deafened by the silence

Is it something that I’ve done?

I know that there are millions

I can’t be the only one who’s so disconnected

It’s so different in my head.

Can anybody tell me why I’m lonely like a satellite?

2)

No longer contact each other :/

No longer close i guess, its been a while we're not talking to each other :'(

What more can i say? I just miss having the three of us. without u by my side, i'm LOST. Totally LOST. Having no one to share stories, share feelings. Sigh.

Things aren't like before.

Just a deep thought from my heart............

Assalamualaikum.

What is meant to be, it will be.

...............................

Ngantuk Zzzz

Susahnya mau tidur.

Kalau tidur pun salu dapat mimpi bukan2.

Then, terjaga balik. Hmmmm.

Another tired day today.

And tomorrow also.

Hmmmm.

But then, still ..... :)

Sincerely,

Wannot 

It hurts :'(

Ya Allah,

kau kuatkanlah semangat aku ini,

kau jauhkanlah aku dari sebarang penyakit yg memudaratkan.

I thought it was end already. 

Berakhir sudah.

Tapi kenapa sakit ni tiba datang2 balik?
Not as teruk as before,

but still can cause pain in my chest,

hard to breath once again,

but can be controlled.

and to prevent that,

i can only go to sleep.

It reduce the pain a bit.

before this, the pain comes sekejap sekejap only

and now, most of the time 

but still, i can hold the pain infront of others

I have to be strong

I am strong

because i'm not sick at all

and this shaking body of mine really freak me out.

would you stop shaking?

I hate it

seriously i hate it

Please go away all the pain

I hate it

:'(

Sakit itu kafarah dosa.

Beerti Allah sedang memberi kita peluang untuk mencuci segala dosa2 kecil kita.

:'(

Slowly return.

This past two weeks really tough on me.

Really tough :/

All of a sudden,im losing the spirit. and i've being attacked. 

Attacked by what?

I keep on having a chest pain, hard to breath, and my whole body systems shaking without a reasons this lately.

I even feel hard to sleep.

If i can sleep, i kept on dreamt of something like a ghost or mengerikan.

for the chest pain,

I even went to pusrawa, do an ECG test.

The result is???????

Doc said everything is fine, and it is just a hyper ventilation syndrome.

Is it true?

Me myself also dont know.

*SIGH HARDLY DEEPLY*

What can i only do now is be strong. I have to.

My inner side have to be strong, not for others but for myself.

And im really trying on it right now.

I'll slowly gettin back on the track, for the future, InsyaAllah.

I'll slowly increase my appetite, get to normal back, InsyaAllah.

I'll slowly fill my empty heart, with my Taqwa, InsyaAllah.

InsyaAllah, jika Allah mengizinkan. Ameen :)

To mama abah, sorry  if i let u guys down.

i know i shouldnt say  i want to quit  study.

Its not me saying that actually.

and Alhamdulillah now im gettin better.

Its also from your Du'a that makes me return :)

I love you mama abah ;)

and I know u guys do miss me. kann? ecececeh.

Do wait for me to come back, Raya, InsyaAllah :)

To umi and kakak, sorry,

 bcos im always be the one who trouble both of you.

im always sick, im always itu, im always ini. hmmm

I didnt mean that, truly sorry from me.

and thank you also for always taking care of me.

i do appreciate it.

i dont know how to repay both of u, but surely Allah will :)

and i also lovin both of you as well.

words are hard to be describe, 

but HIM knows how deep my love towards  umi & kakak.

Te amo ;)

friends there, 

you have to know that we here always miss you love you.

GIve us strong yayang :(

Al fatihah..

Assalamualaikum.